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| Marriage Revolution Conferences |
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| Turn Your Marriage Into A Blazing Love Affair! |
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"Forget the former things; do not dwell on the past.
See, I am doing a new thing! Now it springs up; do you not
perceive it? I am making a way in the desert and streams in
the wasteland" (Isaiah 43:18-19).
Daniel W. Smith and Debra White Smith have been married nearly 25 years. As a result of the innovative concepts their ministry teaches, they have a blazing love affair marriage that many people dream of but might never have. They are a down-to-earth couple who are crazy about each other, love the Lord, and want to help other couples grow into a dynamic and exhilarating union. They presently work with a wide array of denominations and have just been appointed Marriage Enrichment Coordinators for the Dallas District Church of the Nazarene.
To bring Marriage Revolution Conferences to your church, call 1-866-211-3400. Daniel and Debra will minister to any size group and do their best to work within your budget.
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"Daniel and Debra are a wonderful team. Their marriage conferences come alive with their love for life and for each other. Any group would be blessed by their teachings. Plus, they bring incredible books and resources with them that enhance their ministry to couples."--Dr. Stan Toler, Pastor, Author, International Speaker
"Daniel W. Smith and Debra White Smith are truly anointed by God in the area of marriage enrichment. Their ministry to us was exactly what we needed. They have made a lasting impact on the marriages of our church." --Mark Eby, North Carolina Pastor
"Debra offers the most powerful message on marriage that I have ever heard." --Retired Pastor, Indiana
"I will be requiring couples who come for professional assistance to use Debra White Smith's book, Romancing Your Husband, as a resource to recover the Master's plan for vital marriages." --Dr. Roy Rotz, Ph.D., Licensed Marriage Therapist, University Professor
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 The Revolution Difference:
According to national polls, many Christian marriages are falling apart at a higher rate than non-Christian marriages. This is not happening without cause. Too many times the Word of God is stripped to produce concepts that support cultural norms from 50-100 years ago (the hierarchical marriage). American culture 50-100 years ago is not the model by which we should craft marriage concepts; neither is American culture from the 21st Century, for all the matter. The teachings of Jesus Christ, the sinless Son of God, is the place where all healthy marriage concepts must start. Unfortunately, some of the "biblical" concepts taught can actually violate the teachings of Jesus Christ. Because of this dysfunction, husbands and wives can be left sexually and emotionally frustrated. From there, many Christian husbands and wives are falling into pornography addictions and indulging in emotional affairs. Then, the "pillar of the church" couple divorces due to a sexual affair.
Jesus Christ's teachings were revolutionary! He presented general concepts that apply to every relationship we have--including marriage. When marriage concepts start with the teachings of Christ, a revolution happens!
Marriage Revolution Highlights:
When couples embrace Marriage Revolution truths, they both take themselves off the throne of the home and marriage and place Jesus Christ on the throne and in the center of all things. Fighting for control stops. When the couple comes to a matter where they disagree, instead of arguing or insisting upon their own way or manipulating one another, they pray together until they come to a compromise or discover what God really wants. Wives stop viewing their husbands as a father-figure and are free to view their husbands as their lover. Husbands stop viewing their wives as a person one rung beneath them who should walk behind them and are free to wholly cherish their wives. Neither spouse is worried about being equals. Instead, they are focused on serving and empowering each other and giving all they have to each other. A blazing love affair ignites between the couple as they truly become one and grow closer and closer to each other. Sexual and emotional frustration ends for both spouses. The couple grows into a marriage that transcends time and culture...a marriage God intended when He created Adam and Eve in the Garden of Eden.
"For this cause a man shall leave his
father and his mother, and shall cleave to his wife;
and they shall become one flesh" (Genesis 3:24, NASB).
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 Scriptural Support
From Jesus:
"So in everything, do unto others as you would have them do unto you," (Matthew 7:12, NIV). Husbands should not isolate any scripture to create marriage concepts or roles for their wives they don't want applied to them. Wives should not adopt attitudes toward men or their husbands they don't want directed at them. Female chauvinism (men-hating radical feminism) is just as destructive and sinful as using the Word of God to support male chauvinism.
"This is My commandment, that you love one another, just as I have loved you" (John 15:12, NASB). Saying sacrificial love is the husband's role is like saying salvation is a role. Jesus Christ commanded all believers to unconditional, sacrificial love. This includes husbands and wives. Paul himself supports this when he states, "Older women likewise are to be reverent in their behavior...that they may encourage the young women to love their husbands" (Titus 2:3a, 4a).
"So he [Jesus] got up from the meal, took off his outer clothing, and wrapped a towel around his waist. After that, he poured water into a basin and began to wash his disciples' feet, drying them with the towel that was wrapped around him" (John 13:4-5, NIV). Jesus Christ never told anyone to strive toward being equals. Instead, He commanded His followers to put themselves last and embrace a servant's heart. When both spouses are focused on washing each other's feet, the breath-taking Spirit of Christ is freed within the union.
"Then Jesus said to His disciples, 'If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross and follow Me. For whoever wants to save his life will lose it, but whoever loses his life for me will find it'" (Matthew 16:24-25, NIV). When we lose ourselves in Christ, we are free to lose ourselves in our mates. Miracles happen at this point.
From Paul:
"Submit to one another out of reverence for Christ," (Ephesians 5:21). Healthy submission is unconditional love in action. As with love, saying submission is a role is like saying salvation is a role. Jesus Christ was the supreme example of submission. Husbands and wives should both model Him. This leads to healthy submission for both spouses rather than unbalanced, dysfunctional submission for wives only. Unfortunately, women who are taught one-sided, dysfunctional submission do not usually celebrate or contribute to the sexuality of the marriage. Sadly, the men who enforce dysfunctional submission cannot truly cherish their wives. Both spouses are left lonely and longing for an earth-moving relationship.
"For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church" (Ephesians 5:23, NASB). Within the light and context of the teachings of Jesus Christ and other teachings from Paul, the most logical and balanced interpretation of the word "head" is "fountain head of life" or "source," as defined by Lawrence O. Richards in his Bible Background Commentary.
"I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me" (Galatians 2:20, NASB). Most mainline denominations teach that all Christians should, like Paul, count ourselves crucified with Christ. This means we take ourselves off the throne of our hearts and place Jesus Christ there. Christians who have done this testify to a victorious and blessed walk with the Lord because Jesus Christ has free access to their whole heart. The same concept can and does apply to marriage with the exact same results. When both spouses take themselves off the throne of their hearts and home and place Jesus Christ there, a victorious, strong, and breath-taking marriage emerges.
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 In the Beginning
"The Lord God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him" (Genesis 2:18). According to the Reflecting God Study Bible, "For the first time in creation something is 'not good.' Without female companonship and a partner in reproduction, the man could not fully realize his humanity. 'Helper' does not imply subordination; indeed, it is ofen used of God himself (Psalm 33:20; 70:5; 121:2)." According to noted theologeon Joseph Coleson, the word "helper" means, "A power like it, facing it as equal." However, as already stated, Christ never called anyone to strive for equality, but rather to have a servant's heart.
"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them. God blessed them and said to them, 'Be fruitful and increase in number; fill the earth and subdue it. Rule over the fish of the sea and the birds of the air and over every living creature that moves on the ground'" (Genesis 1:27-28). God created both men and women in His image. Any attitude, roles, or marriage concepts we project upon our spouses are projected upon the image of God. After the creation, God gave Adam and Eve a joint assignment: to rule creation together, as a team, a unit, as one. This assignment was not made to Adam alone--but to Adam and Eve together.
"To the woman he [God] said...., 'Your desire will be for your husband, and he will rule over you'" (Genesis 3:16b). This message from God came after Adam and Eve sinned in the garden. Many noted theologians state that the word "desire" also has its roots in the desire to rule. So, God was saying that because of the sin that has entered Adam and Eve's hearts and world, Eve will want to rule Adam and Adam will want to rule Eve. Therefore, the beautiful oneness that was celebrated in the Garden of Eden has been shattered by the desire to rule and control each other rather than the desire to work together to rule creation. Whether a person is male or female, the fallout of sin is the desire to rule, control, manipulate, and elevate the self; this destroys marriages. When Genesis 3:16 is used as the foundation for marriage concepts, the marriage is being based upon the fallout of sin, rather than the freedom found in Christ. Saying that the husband's role is to rule the wife or the wife's role is to rule the husband is equivalent with saying it's one brother's role to kill the other brother since Cain killed Abel. Murder happened because of sin; so does self-elevated ruling. Well-meaning people have taught that the husband is to rule the wife because this is God's curse upon Eve and ultimately wives. When women view their husbands and their relationship with their husbands as a curse, they usually put no energies into the sexuality and romance of the marriage because they see their husband as a negative and dreaded dynamic in their lives. Instead of the marriage being a blazing love affair, the husband and wife both suffer from emotional and sexual deprivation and are prime targets for extramarital affairs. What a tragedy! Especially when we consider that marriage with Christ as the center can be a heaven-on-earth experience!
Jesus Christ came and said, “Neither be ye called masters: for one is your Master, even Christ. But he that is greatest among you shall be your servant. And whosoever shall exalt himself shall be abased; and he that shall humble himself shall be exalted” (Matthew 23:10-12, KJV). And Paul wrote, "Love is not self-seeking" (1 Corinthians 13:5). When a husband and wife love each other with Christ's love, they are focused upon elevating their spouse and doing everything they can to empower their spouse, not themselves.
"Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth--
for your love is more delightful than wine. Pleasing is the
fragrance of your perfumes; your name is like perfume poured out.
No wonder the maidens love you! Take me away with you--
let us hurry!" (Song of Songs 1:1-4).
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